Buried Inside Me
by MadaraMad
Summary: What if Percy Jackson was buried so deep that he changed himself into Luke Castellan? Percy is tired of being a pawn of the gods. He doesn't want to be controlled by anyone. He doesn't want to control anyone. He doesn't want to follow anyone. But will he accept the enemy's hand when he has no other choice? Will he find the real Percy Jackson before it's too late?
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: All the characters belong to Rick Riordan.**_

Chapter 1

The memory. The memory kept coming back to the top. Like a bottle in the water. No matter how many times you try to sink it, it will always come back to the top. Half submerged in water and half breathing fresh air.

'Why? Why are you doing this?' she had said with a concerned and broken look. It hurt him to see her like this. She was the one thing he still held on to. But she had let go of him. That's what made the memory worse. The fact that he couldn't let go.

'Because I'm tired. Tired of being the pawn. You should be able to understand this. You were a pawn too.' he had said. And it was no lie. Both of them had been pawns too many times.

'Yes. I was a pawn too. So many times in so many games. But don't you see what you're doing? You're becoming like... You're becoming like _him_. And it's breaking me. It's breaking me all over again!' And it was true. He could see the broken pieces on her face. 'I trusted you! I thought you wouldn't be like him! It was one of the reasons I loved you! I loved you for a lot of things but I loved you most because I thought you wouldn't be like him!' She had raised her voice now. She was shouting. But he didn't even flinch. He was too distracted.

'Annabeth. This is different. I'm doing it on my own. I'm not following anyone.' He had said her name like it was the last time he ever would. It had sounded so fragile.

'Percy, please! I know you are in there somewhere. Buried so deep that you can't even recognize yourself anymore.' She had started crying now. Sobbing. Tears streaming down her face.

'Annabeth, did I ever tell you how beautiful you are? How strong you are? You're stronger than me. You always have been. Every time we saved the world,' she was looking at him now with big grey eyes. He could see the hope in them. The hope that he wouldn't do this. 'Every time we saved the world,' he repeated, 'You were the one who did the work. You used your brains. You found new strategies. You killed most monsters. But I was the one who got all the credit. I tried to give the credit to you but no one ever accepted it. They only saw you as my sidekick. But you weren't. You never were. We both were always a team.'

'So come back! Don't leave the team. I can't be a team on my own.' She had said. That's what tempted him the most. Those three sentences. But he didn't. He didn't come back. He left the team. He left her to be a team on her own. She had walked away from him and that's the last thing he remembers.

He had woken up with his teeth chattering. He was freezing. His clothes were tattered and torn. This reminded him of when Hera put him to sleep for eight months but he had his memories this time. His first instinct was to check if he had Riptide. He didn't. He had the pen but when he uncapped it, it turned into a very familiar sword that was not even close to Riptide, his old sword. This sword was someone else's. It was _his_. It was Luke Castellan's sword. It was Backbiter. It can kill both mortals and demigods. It was what he used to be afraid of and what he still was afraid of. If he was going to do this, he had to do it properly. With Riptide. And for him to do it with Riptide, he had to find out who put him here and get Riptide back. The last person who had Backbiter was Kronos. Or Luke. But both of them are dead. So who gave this sword to him? Who took away Riptide? Who put Backbiter into this pen? All of these questions lead to the same person. But who?

This memory and these questions kept coming back to him since yesterday. And he had his suspicions. But first, he needed to gain strength to find him. To find the person who gave Backbiter to him. And to find him, Percy needed every bit of his strength.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Rick Riordan**_

Chapter 2

The last time he was here, it was with Annabeth. That was two years back, when they still loved each other. It took him an entire year to finally come back. He was still afraid of this place but he needed Riptide back. And this was the only person that could have given him Backbiter. This was the only person that _would_ have. Tartarus.

'I never thought you would be back. What do you want?' Tartarus licked his lips like this was what he had been waiting for. He probably had been waiting for Percy to show up.

'I want two things. I want Riptide back. I also want answers.'

'Why? Riptide is something Percy Jackson would use. The person who you used to be. So why do you want to keep something of your past?' Tartarus looked like he already knew the answer but he just wanted to hear it.

'Riptide belongs to me. Blackbiter is something Luke would use. I'm not Luke.' It wasn't a lie. But it wasn't the truth either. He wasn't Luke but he was starting to understand him.

'Really? Because I certainly see Luke Castellan in you. You both have the same goals. For the exact same reasons. So tell me, Jackson. How are you different from Luke Castellan?'

Percy was tempted to list out the physical differences between them but decided against it. 'Luke followed Kronos. I don't want to follow anyone. Luke wanted followers. I don't want followers. I am very different from Luke in many other ways and you know it. Same goals or no, I am not Luke Castellan.'

Tartarus laughed. He laughed a very cold and evil laugh. 'I may not be the god Apollo or the Oracle but I can promise you that soon you will follow me. Soon you will have no choice but to follow me. And that is exactly what will make you like Luke Castellan. And that is exactly what will make me like Kronos.'

And Percy knew that one day the promise would come true. He could already feel it. But he denied the truth. It was much easier than accepting it. 'Well then, when that day never comes, you can tell me. Now I want what I came here for. Riptide and answers.'

Tartarus grinned. It made Percy uncomfortable. 'I already gave back Riptide. I gave it back from the beginning. As for answers. It depends on the questions.'

Percy didn't even need to think about the questions. They came right out of his mouth. 'Three questions. Why are you so eager to overthrow the gods? What have they ever done to you? Why do you want my help?'

'Ah Percy. I want to overthrow the gods for pleasure. For torture. To avenge my wife's death. Now my wife cannot wake up ever again and it's their fault. They have done nothing good for me so I decided to return the favor. But I know I can't do it alone. I need help. I need your help. You see Percy, the gods used you too many times because of your powers. If we could just use your powers against them, they would never even think about interfering with your life. You and me, we would make a powerful team. An immortal team. We couldn't die because I have the power to make you immortal, Perseus Jackson. I am a primordial god. Higher than the gods. Stronger than the gods. And I can make you stronger too.'

'Thanks for the offer and all but no thanks. I got what I needed so excuse me if I leave. I have some unfinished business to attend to.' Percy said leaving as Tartarus opened the Doors of Death for him. It was only the next day that Percy wondered why Bob and Damasen weren't there. Percy felt guilty and ashamed for not thinking about them sooner but he wasn't going back to check where they were. Tartarus had said enough. Percy was sure if he went back, Tartarus wouldn't let him leave until Percy joined him. And Percy didn't want to join him. He wanted to do this on his own.


End file.
